why me

I've had many conversations with God about 'whys' over the last three years. I can assure you many of those conversations were not pleasant. I have voiced my frustration a lot.

Over the last few months I've had overwhelming 'why me' moments that have hit me very differently than the 'why me' moments of recent years.

Lately I've been overwhelmed with the sweetness of this little life I have. I don't understand the 'why' of how I've come to have a fun, loving husband and two wonderful, healthy boys. There are so many people out there struggling. Struggling to find someone to share their lives with. Struggling with infertility, pregnancy loss or whatever it may be that keeps them from having kids. So, why me?

I'm incredibly blessed to be able to stay home with our boys, teaching them the things that are of importance to our family. Why me?

My husband has a job that pays our bills. We have a home in a community that I love. We have amazing family and friends who have seen us through so many things. Why me?

On this day of giving thanks, I am incredibly grateful for all the wonderful blessings in my life.

in our current situation

it's hard to believe it was a year ago today I posted about my pregnancy for the first time here.

Fifteen weeks pregnant a year ago...today. Anxious. Tired. Already worn out with the notion of bedrest. We were barely into the long haul.

I was looking for a specific bible verse this week that a friend emailed me while I was on bedrest. During that search I found an email from another friend that is so beautiful to me. I wanted to wait until we get a little closer to Leoindas' birthday to share it, but I just can't!

In reference to the struggle of the unknowns we were facing she wrote, "It's all about handling being face to face with a monster..... look all through the Bible - every miracle in the Bible is preceded by a monster (example - I Samuel 17).... monsters lead to miracles... and they always show God's glory....and as the Bible shows over and over, God is bigger than any monster.... so you just keep standing firm."

One year ago I had no idea what was in store for us. In the wee hours of the morning one year later the sweet miracle that followed a monstrous journey is snoring, ferociously I might add, in my arms.

the titanic

is not in our current curriculum. However, I have a five year old boy fascinated with the history of the Titanic and all that were on board. Since picking up books at the library Friday afternoon we have read just about everything available to us from the juvenile section at our local library. I'm online right now ordering a video and an audio on the subject at hand through an interlibrary loan.

He is truly Titanic crazy. All he talks and thinks about is the Titanic. Everything we do he can relate to the Titanic. He wakes up and goes to sleep asking about it. And, my favorite, is that every time we read something else about it he refers to what one of the other books said and can take you to the exact page.

The 'teacher' lesson for me: When he's excited or curious about something...RUN WITH IT!

~~~

We finally waded through all Leonidas' labs last week. His hematocrit is a touch low and iron is still borderline with the extra things I've been doing. We're adding an iron supplement now and going back in two weeks to check it all out again.

Something tells me he doesn't really care what his labs are...

While we were at one of Leonidas' many appointments Adison hung out with his Grandma. They worked on a little project. He has enjoyed nibbling on it and I think he's just a touch proud of their handy work.

~~~

I thought Adison's days of footed pjs were over until he liked a pair of Leonidas' and asked if I'd get him another pair...

He is still climbing in the crib with Leonidas when we tuck him in every night. The other night I left them both for a few minutes and had Adison turn off Leonidas' lights when he came out. Later when I checked in on Leonidas I found him with all his favorite buddies cuddled around him. I think his big brother took care of that for him!

Look at those lashes! How is it that boys always get long, thick ones?!

check up

Last week's check up for Leonidas was full of surprises. First, it seems my method of weighing him is nearly a pound off! He officially weighs 13 pounds 15 ounces, not 14 pounds 13 ounces. He's not gaining as fast as they'd like to see this time, so we're adding some extra calories to his cereal.

Then we did the heal poke to check his iron and it was pretty low. I was shocked! The added calories to his cereal are also iron packed so I'm hoping to take care of that at the same time.

We had to do a blood draw at the hospital on Friday after our regular appointment so his doctor could check up on several things because of the low iron. Late in the afternoon when I still hadn't heard anything I called the doctor's office to check on his results. They hadn't heard anything either. Today, Monday, around noon when I still hadn't heard back from anyone I called again. Apparently the lab was supposed to call to tell me they didn't draw enough blood and we needed to come back in for a redraw. No wonder I didn't hear anything! No one wants to stick a baby twice! Still no news on the second draw...I'm sure it'll all run much more smoothly and efficiently when the government takes over though. Oops...I promised myself no more political posts, better turn it around.

While we were doing the second blood draw for Leonidas, Adison said he had to look away. Then as we were leaving he told me it hurts his heart that Leonidas had to have a needle stuck in him. Then he clarified that he was still glad he wasn't the one getting blood drawn, but it made his heart hurt for Leonidas anyway.

I still have a hard time believing Leonidas has dropped off his growth curve with as much as he's eating. We've recently added sweet potatoes and apple sauce and he's eating at breakfast and dinner with us now. He's so interested that anytime we're eating around him I have to give him something to chew on too. He's even started taking the spoon away from me while I'm feeding him and trying to shove it in his mouth himself.

We put together this fun and very edible craft with Adison the other night...




Anytime we're eating something Leonidas can't have, like oreo turkeys, Adison always says, "Poor Mighty, no oreos for you!"

Thanks, April, for the fun idea!!

leaves, leaves

raked away...come again, or not, another day! Mental note to self...always wear gloves when raking an entire yard of leaves. Every year I end up with huge blisters and every year I wonder why, oh why I didn't just go grab a pair of gloves out of the garage.

We've been making great use of our boxes. Adison likes making forts with them using every rug in the house. Friday night we had some friends over and cut out swords and shields for three boys and two dads. It was wild around here! Dads were storming the castle, boys were attacking dads. Then in the excitement Adison would forget he was on the same team with the boys and whack one of them...or so he said...maybe it was just the excitement of whacking everyone in sight.

Latest Adisonisms

Earlier in the summer Adison was really into wearing all camo. About that time I found him some camo underwear. He was thrilled to say the least. The other day he was getting dressed on my bed and couldn't find his camo underwear. They were lost among the sheets somewhere. He looked and looked and finally, exasperated said, "I think we're gonna have to get rid of all my camo underwear." I, of course, asked why. He replied, "They're just too hard to find."

Adison, noticing my belly button, excitedly asked, "Did you have an extension cord coming from your belly button when you were a baby too?!"

boxes

At what point does our fascination with boxes end? Maybe when we can't fit in them anymore?

My parents have been sending lots of boxes to us this week. Something about them trying to get rid of things and me being a sucker and saying, "I'll take it all!"

There are trails and trails of these all through our house.

~~~

Most days I love homeschooling. Today was another good day...

The instructions for this experiment were to use a pie pan and a jar to make our volcanoes indoors. It was way more fun building volcanoes outside in the sand!

and another thing

I forgot to mention this little tidbit in my last post...

Halloween night as Adison and I were sitting on my in-laws front porch waiting for trick or treaters because he was so excited about giving out candy, I ate two midget sized tootsie rolls from the candy basket...TWO. My dear son said, "Mom, I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but will you quit eating the candy so we don't run out?"